Self-Love. One of the most basic necessities for manifesting the life of your dreams
Self-love is a term that everyone’s familiar with, but often undervalued and tossed about in conversation with little understanding of how important it actually is. If you search the hashtag on Instagram you’ll find 37.3m posts (and counting) At first glance you could assume that most of them are a vanity project – a way to boost ego-fuelled likes, and a desire to be seen on-trend. But delve a little deeper and you’ll discover millions of people that seek to live a life of fulfilment; they’re desperate to achieve their purpose in life, which is happiness. And the self-love label calls to them as a way to return to their light
Let’s take a moment to bust a self-love myth
Self-love is not just about looking in the mirror and liking what you see
Self-love is a deep journey that has you wrestling in the mud with every single part of yourself (yes, even the ugly parts) and brings up everything that you really don’t want to deal with. But, as I’m sure you know, the more you try to push something down into the depths of your subconscious then the more it’ll grow and will eventually explode as a giant sh*t show in your life
Self-love is the total acceptance of who you are; how you look, how you feel, your inner secrets, your deepest desires, all the human shadows and all the brilliance of your divine light. It’s being okay with everything you’ve ever done and everything you’ve yet to do.
I’m going to let you in on a little secret…
I’m currently having a wild and crazy love affair! Looking back, it’s been going on for as long as I can remember but only recently have I realised the special bond that’s developed
You wanna know the name of my love? Well, it’s me of course. The relationship with yourself is the most epic love you can possibly experience AND it has all the qualities you’d expect from an awesome partnership – respect, intimacy, trust and commitment!
Self-love is something I’ve ALWAYS been a huge advocate of, but it’s also something that I’ve often failed to give myself (and I’m sure I’m not the only one). I’m the first to champion someone else; giving them positive advice, helping them see their brilliance and celebrating when they turn a corner – and as a person who believes strongly in taking the lead, I started to turn my attention inwards and gave myself permission to be my own priority. And the result has been life-changing
Like attracts like. Fact
All humans desire connection. It’s pretty much in our DNA, we’re social beings with feelings. If happiness is our ultimate purpose in life then it goes without saying that love is a way to achieve this – when we love, we feel fabulous. Butterflies start a dance party and the world vibrates itself into peace.
If you want to attract the greatest love of all, then you need to give it to yourself first
And what’s even more awesome is that when you’re in a place of pure love then every other thing you desire will come toward you at huge speed. Love yourself unconditionally and you can manifest anything you want
But it requires complete devotion and doesn’t happen with the click of a Thanos finger. You’ve gotta put the work in, which you can do in 5 steps:
1. Honour your emotions
We live in a time when emotion is seen by many as weakness. But it’s actually our greatest strength. By paying attention to your emotions, you’re hearing the call of your soul and what it’s asking of you. When you feel the need to cry, rather than fight back the tears, let them flow – there’s healing in crying and by doing so, you release any emotion that you’re holding onto, allowing you to let it go and move forward. When you feel anger, don’t for a moment think you’re a bad person – there’s a passion inside you that’s been triggered and you feel deeply protective of it, journal your thoughts, dance it out or have a therapeutic pillow punching party. Guilt, sadness, shame – the list goes on with emotions, but each are important and should never be ignored. Lean into them and honour them, for they’re a beautiful part of you
2. Connect to your soul
The external world is so noisy that it’s all too easy to get consumed with things that don’t concern you. Your soul knows you better than anyone; it knows your desires, your strengths, your pain, and it knows the best ways forward for you. When you learn to listen then it becomes so much easier to navigate through life, enjoying all the things that make you happy. Meditation is the simplest way to tune in; just give yourself some daily time in the quiet and begin to have those conversations that will perfectly guide you
3. Set clear boundaries
How many times have you said yes to someone or something, when you really wanted to say no? Did it work out okay in the end, I’m guessing not. You probably felt resentful at doing something that wasn’t in alignment with your needs / wants. By learning to set boundaries and to say yes to the things that light you up, you’re going to need to say no more often – and here’s the truth, people will respect you a lot more when you do this. You’re giving off the message that you matter, and your happiness will always be your number one priority. And if someone gets the hump, that’s their problem – you probably don’t need them around you that much anyway
4. Treat yourself like royalty
You are worthy. You are deserving. And you need to remind yourself of this every single day. Treat yourself to things that make you feel good, pamper yourself, indulge, show off your talents – why wait for someone else to give you compliments, or gifts or recognise your awesome-ness – when you start doing it yourself, you’ll be surprised how your light automatically starts to shine so brightly that others will match what you’re doing. Your actions will become infectious and you’ll receive a bucket load of love in return
5. Do more of what you love
Yep, give up being miserable with life. You’re here to have fun and to experience all the wonderful things that surround you. Hate the job you’re in? Look for something else, and inject some fun into the old one until you’ve made the transition. Hate your relationships? Move on to new ones and grow alongside inspiring people. Feeling unfulfilled? Go find something that gives you meaning. Hate your wardrobe? Sell your old clothes and go buy new ones, you’ll feel fabulous afterwards. Not sure what it is you love? Then go on an adventure and find out. The world is your playground, so don’t limit yourself by thinking that you have to settle for less than you deserve
When I joined the self-love train, it was hard to begin with. Of course it was, I had to open up to all the things I didn’t want to give attention to. But I knew I wanted life to change and I was ready to learn who I really was – which was the most empowering thing I’ve ever done
I see so many people dulling their light and it saddens me. There’s so much beauty and potential in every single human, and everyone is capable of taking back their power whenever they choose. They just need to make that choice
It sounds perfect right? Well, it is and you can start your very own epic love affair today. The first thing you need to do is say yes. Say yes to yourself and open your mind to the divine magic that’s all around you. Your soul made its first move on you a long time ago, now it’s your turn – acknowledge its presence and give it a cheeky wink
Once connection is made then you can start to dance. Your soul is part of you, and never leaves your side – it’s there holding you and guiding you – follow the lead and in time, the steps will become easier and more effortless
Great relationships can only flourish when you’re in a good place yourself. So make yourself a priority and give yourself the love that you would happily give to others
I urge you to have some fun and say yes to all the epic opportunities that come your way! You totally deserve that. And you totally deserve to manifest the greatest life you can dream of
Ready to start your self-love journey?
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